buildingatreehouse: First Night Out

I just want to see you
When you're all alone
I just want to catch you if I can
I just want to be there
When the morning light explodes
On your face it radiates
I can't escape
I love you 'till the end

I just want to tell you nothing
You don't want to hear
All I want is for you to say
Why don't you just take me
Where I've never been before
I know you want to hear me

Catch my breath
I love you 'till the end

I just want to be there
When we're caught in the rain
I just want to see you laugh not cry
I just want to feel you
When the night puts on it's cloak
I'm lost for words don't tell me
All I can say
I love you 'till the end
-the Pogues

Introduction to the Weekend:
Pat and I got our first night out since Parenthood. We went to my friend's wedding. It was amazing. I was apprehensive that morning about how Jack was going to do. Plus I was exhausted. Friday night Jack woke up every hour until waking up for the day at 7:30 a.m. He was grouchy and crabby and not feeding on schedule. This meant that he was going to take more than one bottle as I originally intended while I was gone. I was concerned about him staying with my mom and screaming the whole time. We went to the wedding and came back after the ceremony to check on him and change clothes before heading to the reception. He was doing great just sleeping in my mom's arms. I was flustered about what to wear and how much weight I had gained also. I was on the verge of new mommy breakdown mode when my Mom and Pat reassured me that I needed the night out and I didn't want to miss my friend's big night. I strapped on my new dress and two pairs of spanks and out the door we went.
I digress:
I may have mentioned that I peddled my wares in the corporate retail world for several years after graduation. These years after graduating from college were hard. I thought that I'd graduate from college, get a great job, make some money, start my life, be successful (blah, blah, blah). That is what every college student thinks and then you graduate and except a job making $30,000, working terrible hours, and living pay check to pay check. It is one of the hardest periods of change to go through and I had a hard time with it. In those years of working at a terrible job, late nights, every weekend, every holiday, being stressed out, overworked and tired...I met some really great people. They were in the same boat essentially; all young and starting to build their lives too. In the years we worked together we began collectively hating the company and loving each other. We built a family. I think in part that is what kept me there as long as it did. Now we have all moved on and we continue to move through life together. I remember the exact day that I met my friend years ago that yesterday was getting married. She moved to the city from Chicago with a boyfriend that ended up being all wrong. She transferred to our store from a store up there. She was new to the city and starting over (without the boyfriend). She made the most of things finding a roommate on craigslist. A few months later she met her fiance at her birthday party at a bar. During that same time, I had just moved in with Pat and we had bought our first house. He had his kidney transplant that fall and we got engaged that Christmas. She was one of the first people I texted with the news even though we'd only known each other a few months...Yesterday she got married.

Back up to speed:
It might have been my first night out of the house. It might have been my first drink since 11 months ago. It might have been getting together with old friends I hadn't seen in months. It might have been the magic of witnessing a friend's marriage. It might have been postpartum hormones.
Whatever the case. I was very nostalgic as I sat and talked with my two friends (all three of us new mommies) and realized that we were somebody's parents. Our kids were home with sitters.
Weird.
I felt old.
I liked it.